Ever felt totally inadequate? Ever wondered whether this motherhood gig is proving way beyond your capabilities? Well, yesterday was that dark day for me. Once again we have been foiled by the Secondary School after school clubs. My son was due to go to Basketball after school. He texted me to say the first session had been cancelled, but the second one was still going ahead so he came home and got changed to go back out again. We went to the school and I dropped him off. “See you in an hour darling”, I trill happily, totally unaware of the events about to unravel. I hung around for a couple of mins, just in case, then left. To save going all the way home and back again, my daughter and I went to the shops. We came back to get him approx 50 mins later. The son that was standing looking forlorn in front of the bike sheds filled me with trepidation. “It was cancelled Mummy”. “Oh no, what have you been doing all this time?” “Well, I walked home, rang the bell, realized you weren’t there, so walked back to school again….” His voice was breaking as the whole episode had clearly upset him. Bearing in mind it takes him 20 minutes to walk to school! The worst thing was he had wanted to take his phone, but I had told him not too in case it got nicked! I was mortified. I felt a total failure. If only I’d let him keep his phone….Or waited outside longer when I’d dropped him off….Or gone home instead of to the shops…my poor boy wouldn’t be looking so sorry for himself. Why does it have to be so hard!!!! I don’t remember any of this from when I started Secondary eons ago! Parents were hardly ever involved in school stuff, the kids just got on with it. Now, it seems I am going through the hard times along with my son… Hopefully we will have more highs than lows!
It did not help when my husband pipes up.. “Oh, so you were off gallivanting instead of being home for your son…” Talk about twisting the knife!!!! Suffice to say we have learnt yet another lesson. If my son is told something by one of his mates, he is not to take it as red, and he needs to ask a teacher! Also I have learnt to always let him keep his phone….Just in case.
What a pants day! However on the plus side, my son cooked scones in Food Technology and brought them home with such pride. He even helped me cook tea and did the washing up! My husband thought he was seeing things when he walked in and there his boy was, in purple marigolds stood at the sink. Long may it continue.
Target: Step up the Secondary School Mumma Plate!